What does this concept have to do with dog training? Well, if you ask me it is the root of training. All too often people are concerned with being ‘alpha’ or ‘dominant’ and forget to be their dog’s friend – didn’t most of us get them as companions anyway? I agree that leadership is important but it is only one part of a healthy dog-human relationship.
I often ask people to put themselves in their dogs’ shoes, so to speak. While it is not a good idea to project human characteristics onto our dogs that they likely don’t have we should try to see things from their perspective. Try this exercise. Ask yourself the following questions and then try to answer them from your dog’s perspective too:
- Can you reliably predict the moods and behavioral patterns of your companion? Are they stable?
- Are expectations clearly communicated? What about things that are discouraged?
- Do you know what will happen if you let your companion down? How do you feel if you disappoint them?
- Do you trust your companion? Would you help them in some way if you could?
- Can you provide for some, if not all, of the needs of your companion? Do you want to?
- Are there boundaries in your relationship?
- What about ‘me’ time if you want or need to be alone?
The answers to these questions will range greatly; there is not one set ‘right answer’ for any of them. I encourage you to answer honestly and if you realize that you could do better holding up your end of the relationship please don’t hesitate to ask for tips on how to improve!
